MORE READERS

So how do you gt more readers ? or get someone interested in your blog that has weight who can help you get paid to blog? how does that happen? Most people I hear about say it just happens. but hoe come it doesnt happen for me? I have been writing fpr a long time. do i need a literary agent? do I need to uncover a scandal? no, i dont think so mt content is sound. it uis sure it is just undiscovered. so i keep plugging alomg hopeful. tell me what you think. it is important or suppy a lead.... I would be grateful and encouraged.

MY MUSE

Just do it

LIF IS NOT OVER BECAUSE i HAD A STROKE! NO NO NO

Often I have wondered what Nike has meant by just do it. But after having a strple I have come to find out it means more than just a catch phrase. It is motivational like the Christmas music I am listening to. Handel.s Messiah a Soulful celebration it makes me want to move something.Having a stroke for some is the end for some because it effects so much, but we have , or i have an option to still make my lifw count. by just doing it. just excercising, just standing, just choosing to think on the good things God has done for and to just do it and dream.Melody.Drean, and not think life is over but it just needs work arounds. Sp look at you, you have noy had a stroke so just do it Dream! Write take steps to make your reality just that. please leave a comment. d

Cranberry sauce by the Jackson's 2015 copyright protected.

Hot Praise Break - Tye Tribbett, Beverly Crawford, Ricky Dillard, Kevin ...

Lance

One more thing, Lance Armstrong: In a perfect world, Lance Armstrong's should have taken an article out in USA today, purchased air time on all of the major networks, sat down alone, unscripted and apologized to every single person he has sued and bullied about juicing. Instead, well, you already know, he helped a friend by giving her the largest viewership her network has ever seen and finally affirmed what most saw and knew all along. I wondered, how could he just ruin people who he knew loved him, cherished his work? How? Is that what it is like to not have a soul? Perhaps he will write a Memoir or blog it out somewhere. For me it seems just too deep to reveal. Like Columbine and Newtown no matter what we do to remedy our conscious we are left muffling tears surrounded by the word 'why'. Other words/cliches come as a solvent: Forgive, move on, this 2 shall pass. Providing some comfort as we ponder the horror of witnessing this humiliation of others for personal gain. 4 all of us, a few consoling phrases: "Weeping may endure....but joy...comes... Press toward the mark...." Sometimes there just aren't easy answers. The only power is in the anecdote of the Living Word. #lancearmstrong

Somebody Else does not live here

Ever wish you were somebody else?  Yes, I sure have.  Carroll Burnett or Cher when they had variety shows.  Their lives looked so free and seemed filled with people who loved them.  Then reporters revealed that the cast on Caroll Burnetts's show were drunk most of the tapings or in competitiom to crack the other.  Shortly there after, Sonny and Cher were divorced. So there went my dream of being somebody else.  My world seemed to get better. 

I hope that this happens as you read this.  Oh, your life isn't so bad.  Sure you have ups and downs over and outs. But you are okay.  So am I  because somebody else does not live here.
I do.

Somebody Else does not live here

Ever wish you were somebody else?  Yes, I sure have.  Carroll Burnett or Cher when they had variety shows.  Their lives looked so free and seemed filled with people who loved them.  Then reporters revealed that the cast on Caroll Burnetts's show were drunk most of the tapings or in competitiom to crack the other.  Shortly there after, Sonny and Cher were divorced. So there went my dream of being somebody else.  My world seemed to get better. 

I hope that this happens as you read this.  Oh, your life isn't so bad.  Sure you have ups and downs over and outs. But you are okay.  So am I  because somebody else does not live here.
I do.

Only child

Political views and such

I haver a friend who seems to be the kindest, most loving guy ever.  That is until President Barack Obama is mentioned. His demeanor takes on that of some sort of superhero aiming to rid anyone of the thought that our President is good in any way.  To me, my friend's views come off just  horrible.  He acts like a woman scorned. His page is filled with hate and he uses scripture to back up his everyword.  Knowing him for more than 10 years, practically being apart of his family and learning this about him makes me feel bamboozled. I don't know what to do.  If I approach him, he will vehemently defend his legal right of freedom of speech.  However, I just wonder, what about as a Christian?  Do we have the right to say whatever we want to about a leader when the scripture instructs us to pray for those who have rule over us? Admittedly,  there have been Presidents who I havn't agreed with on most of what they stood for, however, I did not take an open forum and condemn that President and his family.  Well, my friend is doing just that.  He comes off as as harsh.  His words seem contrary to what and who he believes. Not to long ago, he even wrote  these words when referring to our President:  "The devil is in the details".  I read that and wondered what about the scripture that reads "love conquers a multitude of sins".  The mere fact that most of the time when Jesus was speaking about all types of sins to avoid  or when Paul was addressing the same issues both of them were talking to CHURCH PEOPLE.  God know the people who hates him and He says, "Behold I stand at the door and knock...."  I havn't read yet where He yells and spits and tells us we are all going to Hell if we don't do what He says and we better do it right now OR ELSE.  He call is for us to love.  Love above all.  Love so much we forget about ourselves and concentrate on Him. 

(I don't know.  And I shouldn't care.  But it bothers me.  It bothers the hell out of me.  At some point, we have to invoke what we believe.  Our God is a God of love.  So in the worst of times we are to find a way to Praise HIM and not condemn our fellow and potential joint-heir.) 

Last time I looked he had a picture of the President taking off his shoes to enter a Muslim Mosque.  He critized that action.  I'm thinking that if we live in America where we have the right to choose and such.  What is wrong with respecting another person's religion? I'd like to ask him?  I'd even venture to say, "hey you know that our Bible even instructs that if our brother does not eat meat to honor that, right?  So what was so wrong with President Obama taking off his shoes in respect. Was he to say, I am the President AND a Christian, AND I am NOT taking off my shoes! Seems easier to just respect their mosque.  Visit and go.  Afterall, this is an election year.   Anyway repecting is a form of  love.  And "Love does not provoke.  Love endures. all things".  Somewhere along the way my friend seems to have lost his way of soul-winning and is choosing to be a member of the popular/ be like me-minded thinkers of our world.   You know what I mean, the people who carry the tone of ...if you are not like me... you are 'one of them' and we hate them just because...sort of like someone said to me about Hitler.  He had dark hair and eyes but convinced a nation of people to kill everyone who looked like him and perserve that which he called the pure nation (you remember, blond hair, blue eyes). 

As a Christian, I am reminded to imitate Christ, to walk as dear children.  Children love laughter, they don't like being bullied into believing anything or doing anything.  They greet you with arms open and hope in their faces.  They want to tell you about their day and they want you to listen and spend time with them. Not too much because they want to play.  They enjoy being together, even if is not in the same room.  But my friend denounces President Obama.  He types misleading, bully colored prayers. I barely recognized him anymore. The saddest part is that his posting are so strong against a man who shares his skin color...a man who is a father like he is...a married who fell in love and married the woman of his dreams just like my friend did they have so many similarities except my friend fills pages of disparaging remarks about a man with whom he shares so many commonalities.  

Manipulation and Greed (a Christian perspective)

M and G are terms well known in the Businees world.  There are television programs that bear one of their names.  But no one talks about how it lurks around in the church.  Some people call or label it as having the experience of 'church hurt'.  Here is how it normally works:  A new person comes into the church or it is someone who has been around a while and has decided to not 'bury' there gifts.  They cast aside what 'everyone-might-think and they venture out.  Perhaps to become President of and auxilary or just anything that breaks their old norm of coming to church and going home.  Well, now that action can cause  a re-action and some of the 'members' get uneasy.  Comments begin to flow 'you see how sister or brother so-and-so are acting different...the Pastor calls on them more than me...and I'm the one who has done ..... another comment might even say to you is : 'leadership treats me different since you came around...they don't talk to me as much...'  This seems to start a new 'click'.  And before the moon can go down in blood (as the song goes), that person has said things and repeated things and the listerners are now back where they wanted them. 
That  member who was trying to use their gifts, doing more to help around the church finds it better to allow things go back to the way they were.  They discontinue everything just to keep everyone happy.  That is the power of M and G.  It will not snap or break evenly.  It seeks to tear and rip painfully and unevenly. (Well, that is how I've experienced it) It causes people to feel that 'church hurt' feeling.  The M and G worker feels fulfilled and satisfied once everything returns to their (so-called) normal.  Why? Because they've learned how to  use Manipulation and Greed to get relationships for themselves.  And,  a false esteem.  They're wounding others along the way and not ever recognizing what they have done.  

Manipulation and Greed.

Making it count


The other day I said to a dear friend of mine these words: “ Gosh, you just can’t catch a break”. However, when I got by myself, I realized that I should have thought before I spoke. I rationalized her situation. She has children. They are very young. She recently got transportation. The car is giving her problems. Gas prices are high. She talked about these things over and over. So much so until, I reached in my purse and gave her $10 of my bill money just so she would have some sense that someone cared and she was not in this alone. Again, when I got by myself, reality hit me. She is not alone. She has a nice family and she has financial support that is consistent in her life. I raised four without any child support. I worked three or four jobs and kept food on the table. Complaining was never an option. So I never indulged. Her voice…her worry became mine and I sacrificially gave her my last. It worked. She stopped talking about not having gas money. That solved she moved onto being tired. My 4 children were all born before I was 27 years old. I truly had no tolerance for her complaining. There is just so much more she has to be grateful for and I was lost in her translation of her life. Anyway, as a young Mother that is par for the course.

So I don’t get it when people complain. Like the new Mary, Mary show. Whine, anger, telling people off, whine, sing people into oblivion, whine some more. I am sure they have a large audience. But after watching, I decided to pray for them and the generation they are affecting/effecting. Remembering the balance act of the Universe. Good things, Bad things, up things down things but the exacting of purpose is within the words we say and the actions we take. It is inherent. One thing good happens, another thing like a flat tire or the new bill arrives and you just paid the other one last week! Makes the idea of Wabi Sabi or Agape love a hope rather than a reality. Please let’s break the ‘ woe is me’ syndrome. And adapt the “more than a conquer “ attitude.
Making it count causes all of us to refocus. To do our best not to live in two worlds: Where fear and hatred fall from our lips more than gratitude in the darkest of times. Even when you can’t see it. See it in your heart.
Over the years of marriage and children working with what I have and staying in God’s heart (even during my ‘I’m gonna do this’ stage worked for me. It can work for others if we are willing. Read body language. Get to understand your mate and your children by it and it will never fail and will help you deal with how to maintain your sanity. Our major concern should be is that we are all out to ‘making it count’.

Melody’s blog Spot 04/22/12

This 2012

Gosh! It is 2012 and already quite exciting!

It takes a made up mind to succeed these days.

It used to be I'd listen to Great leaders or read a good NYT best selling Non-fiction to get

my direction.

Even my preacher or pastor....

but last year taught me lot and really just living this life for more than 50 years has given me

a new perspective and shown me that my Mother was indeed correct....

"don't believe everything you hear or see, hold to God's unchanging hand" Because Things have a way of changing.

In my life, so many times I've heard these words, "I am gonna make you a star"!

But then somewhere between my presentation and my life....the person that made that declaration gets lost in translation fading those words to the abyss.

But through all this, I've kept hope alive! Until in November 2010, a benign but power filled tumor was found in my right ear. It rested on my facial and acoustic nerve. So the Neurologist and the ENT doctors decided the best way to get it would be to open my skull and create a path by my brain to get it out....Results are as follows:

I cannot hear anything but scratching sounds in my right ear and I am dizzy all the time. This prohibits me from driving. I havn't worked since March of 2011.

People who don't know me think I am drunk.

People who are on Facebook all the time act as if they didn't know I even had surgery....yet it was posted each day.

I know this is random prose. But it has a purpose. It brings me to a point.

And that point is that ...well I will say it like my audiologist said to me...you weren't born like this so the transition is difficult and coupled with the constant wooziness and near loss of depth perception....that is unsettling to say the least.

At first, though I look normal, but if you hang around me it shows.....and then I see the look of sorrow in people's eyes.

I can no longer direct the choir at church. I cannot participate in festivals because I can no longer drive. I will have to re learn that ....due to the hearing and not being able to turn my head quickly without getting very dizzy.

Yes, people have prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed. Yes, people have fasted and fasted and fasted. Yes, I have been the leader of both packs. But it the hearing loss is gone and the dizziness is not abating.

But even with all this...I choose to move forward. I pretend well. I go out and even though every single thing around me is spinning....I stay out, I don't do what my brain is screaming...go home get in the bed make it stop!!!!!!!!

No, I stay with it...I laugh at the appropreiate times(when I see others laugh). I keep up the appearance of normality.

When I am home alone, that's is when I can sit still...in darkness...with cool pads on my eyes and sing my worship songs.

So be grateful for your life. You can get in your car and go where you want. If someone calls your name you can hear them and turn quickly to go in their direction with out feeling like a spinning top.

To someone like me that is a treasure I am not sure I will experience again.

And don't you dare feel sorry for me. Or think I am being punished by God. No, God has been really good to me.

He keeps the doors opening for me. I have truly wonderful family and friends and for this I never cease to thank God for them, for you.

But just be grateful This 2012.

The past is gone but the Shall Be is all that matters this 2012!

I get it

Last night, as I spoke to my daughter, I told her, I get it. The acceptance of self...the power of Now....the Now of having faith...the allowing yourself to just rest and stop pretending to be someone.....the allowing of myself to be disappointed in others actions but not disgruntled. I get it....how to tell someone words that are not easy to say but necessary for them to hear. I get the left out feeling . ..it has begun to give me power. A quiet power that I never knew I had.

This makes me happy. I used to want to go and be around all the popular people. I used to dream of being with the wealthy and rich of this present world. Until I read the book of Proverbs twice. Until I revisited certain passages over and over and it was there that I found a secret. That I can be wealthy. I can be set. I can be in a place of pleasant riches. As the Proverb states: "Wisdom builds the house, but knowledge fills the rooms with pleasant and precious riches". Not to walking into a bank and seeing $$$$$$$$$$$$ misteriously placed in my account. But providing a way for that money to get there. Even with the secret of finding a man who will love me for me and prefer me over anyone else so much so that he will want to marry me as Melissa Manchester sang so passionately in the 70's. I get it.

But it is a power of keeping. It is the power of living. It is knowing that I am in a place where my faith and my being in the present moment allows all possibility to abide. I cannot adequately explain it. Perhaps this visual will help me see it and by typing it you will see it too! Every door seems closed to me. But in my heart, I know they are opened. But there is nothing in my life telling me that this is nothing more than a contrary hope that will manifest itself in the near future.

However, it is because of the Wisdom, I am sure. I am positive. I know. Everything will come to me as it should and when it is manifested and if I never sell my hope, my faith, my trust short. There are times I've listened to friends who second guess themselves, say things they don't mean and cannot take back. Friends who look really successful and are a bag of water, nuts and bolts. In debt and see nor plan to get out of it. Here I stand. With a hope of knowing that even though I cannot adequately explain it. I get it.

Amy Winehouse

That talented young woman...gone...everyone is speculating. Not one of the TV commentator's who are talking about her say they knew her personally. But yet they are delivering us the news of her death. Telling us about what someone else says about her and we listen hoping for what?! She is gone. She was amazed at her stardom even though she worked in a place that produced stars.

How many of us singers pray daily for a chance like that. To have a band ...to have a voice...to catch people by surprise with the talent we give to them without asking for anything in return. It seems rebellion and sex. Or changing your sex or coming out are the attention getters in our world of "born this way". But when we get alone. Who is it we call, really. When we step out of the shower or close the door on the last visitor leaving our home for the evening. We sit down and alone...what is it...who is it that we think of....even in our "born this way" state of mind...how do we feel inside? Is happiness there or gee, I am so glad that is over! What do we really want?
What did Amy or Jimmi or Janis really want so desparately or Freddie Prinze for that matter....What did Marilyn Monroe see when all the people left her alone? All that fame but hearts filled with despair?

This may or may not make since to anyone but me but I just wonder when you reach that type of stardom can the mind tell you that all you need really is a drug or a drink to get you into a place of contentment. Isn't your talent enough or isn't your parents love enough or isn't love of self enough? I don't know. I just know that I have lived long enough to hear and read the news of the Jimmi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, the Doors lead singer and others ...and it is all drugs...And they all seem to think they have control of it. And if they don't walk away and make a change beginning with every person around them and their lifestyle they remain in it...they try but never get out until they are dead. I have a boyfriend like this.ar...he comes around...then he leaves for days ...weeks...then he comes around telling me how he loves me but I cannot talk about the life of drugs he thinks I am unaware of....Everyone has tried but he won't...but I wonder when you are a "star" shouldn't there be more avenues to go to for recovery?

Perhaps not, it just makes me sad. We live in a land of Mega churches and podcasts of prayer rooms and somehow the people on the gossip shows are never hounded by these church leaders...not even Buddists or any other religion does the reach out to the lost. Because Television is teaching us that destructive behavior is just that...we all have it in us. We all participate in something we shouldn't sometimes. But when we keep doing it. When we keep going to the drugman and he or she won't even protect his/her investment by saying ...no more this week ....try next week...give your system a break....What is happening? Yes we have choice. And I am not saying to take that away...I am just saying ...or asking for tenderness, kindness when I see someone drinking themselves to death or using drugs to ask them ....can't you just give yourself a break for a day? A week? Can't you just try...with my boyfriend he tries but he goes back....it's like he wants death and it won't come quick...it waits...So I had to say goodbye to him...

The worst of all my writing this is I realize that all people do have choices and ending your own life is or can be one of the things a person might want to do. So I write in appeal to the Mega church people...even the busy pastors in this town where I live who pass people who are high and who avoid them.....won't you try to reach out to these personalities and ask them to give love a chance...give peace in their minds an opportunity for love to flow in. After all, isn't that what we should do as Christian believers or peacemakers or even the freethinkers...to offer another option than self destruction? Because Amy is gone.

Vestibular Shcblah blah

It hurts me. The words that a friend spoke to me that my ex said to her 20 years ago. But I learned from it.

I learned that people will say what ever they want...think what ever they want and there is nothing you can do about it.

So living is the best thing. Live strong. Live out loud as the Oxygen network exclaims and Oprah tells us all!

We are to hold our own truths so evident that we are always aware of the elephant in the room ....US.

I grew from the words ....I learned more about her as a person and I decided to apply what Mrs. Taylor said....."Be mindful of the energy you bring into this room".....I will make my energy always positive!

12/31/20210

Becoming Vegetarian

Okay...so I failed today....I have been trying to become a vegetarian. I do well all day. Okay well, not today. I ate at Captain's D's but I couldn't eat all of it. It made me so sick. Then later, I went to Big lots and purchase noodles. I cooked them and ate them they were good...but somehow ...I had planted in my head a Jenkins bbq sandwhich and there I went and ate 2 bones and got sick again....could not finish it....and I don't want to eat it again.....sad...sad...but I did feel better after I ate the noodles and worse once I ate the cake and bbq ....terrible me. Must do better....

My Hair is Red

And so my hair is red. REally red...I did it to cover the gray and of course it didn't work. But with it being so red ...a person has to look really hard to see it. The gray I mean....

Reactions...well, I've had a few...just enough to mention! My Oldest son said..."I like it, Ma". My third rock said, "You look like a lioness" and he growled!

I know I should go to bed and wake a and look at me again....but I like it...it was a shock at first to go from black to fire red. Fits my new mood....my new feeling about life. I don't want to sit on a computer and chat. No way, let's meet and talk...let me hear your voice and you hear mine.


AND I am going to New Orleans for the first time this week. I wanted to approach that city with a different look. And I will.

I tell you all about it when I return. :)

Kelley as a World Missionary- Beginnings

Well, this is just the beginning for the Baby of this Jackson family. He has forgone all his worldy goods and is training to become a Missionary. Funny it seemed just yesterday that he was a baby. I know, it's the Mom in me. But I am excited and a little scared at the same time. My son is going to God knows where to do God's work with people who have less than less and he sees this as a blessing?!?!! Now for all of my agnostics, I am sure you are hearing me loud and clear but since I am a Christian and have been one since I was a mere babe. I do understand the call....I've even served as a Missionary myself. And I am amazed that this is Kelley's life choice. He does this willingly. No fighting only the hope of adventure as he wins souls to Christ. For this I really should be grateful. I am but.... I am used to preacher's even ones who don't really believe what they preach but this is the "job" they chose to they make the best of it. I am also used to the ones who preach because they are just gifted like that, especially in the black community where I grew up. My Mom and her friends would sometimes say..."oh, he is doing the best he can at living uprightly but lawd he can preach". But then, I must give the floor to the preachers who really enjoy what they do...all of them, black, white, asian, hindus, buddists, priests they know they have a call and they give up nearly everything to pursue it. The Kathryn Kulman's of our times, the Dr. Paul Walker and Pastor Cymbala's who go to places so different from themselves and tell people about a Christ who loves and who allows choices and who died for us all. This seems to be the path of my son in it's most inifinite degree. Leave hot showers to go to places where the water is shared by the locals animals and humans. To give up television and embrace the long dark night under the stars. To shake a hand or carry a child and all the while whispering a prayer of comfort....perhaps he will learn new languages and come home to teach us. Perhaps he will not come home but find a new home changing lives forever. This is my Kelley. The little boy who nearly died at 3 weeks old. The little boy who was healed by pronouncing fervently "In the Name of Jesus of Nazerath, be healed" as I held him as a young Mom home alone not knowing what else to do because the doctors had given him up. This same Kelley who just recovered from surgery due to his diagnosed Chron's disease. He continues to fight battles...to recover. His goal is to tell others of this Christ. No I don't understand it all but I accept his decision and support him with all my being. Won't you join me. Even if you are agnostic and may never believe as we do in our Christ...Kelley will also help build home and schools and care for the sick and read to the children and he will dance and they will probably show him a step or two. More than anything just standing alongside the locals where ever he goes to help. Join us. An adventure of the love kind. Again, Join us.